Who exactly is Ted? Ted exactly is no one. Ted is many and one. To become a Ted you must sacrifice your identity. No you don't have to give up your self, just your identity? The latter is dogmatic. It's the flag you wave on the marble arch, as Leonard Cohen says, but love is not some victory march...Just be Ted. As Ted, you'll find that you work that much harder to do something unique and useful for the world, since you don't have a unique and useful name. In short, you Ted out. If you don't believe me on any of this, ask Ted. I expect lots of Teds to comment on this post to further illuminate tedness for all Teds. I don't even know if Ted should be capitalized, and I'm Ted. Is Ted a cult? No--anyone is welcome, but you must be ready for the sacrifice. Will you give up your measly little identity card, and enter the greater consciousness. Perhaps as Ted we become more ourselves? We Teds have met other Teds. Once at a Phish show we met a group of Teds who truly Ted out every night. It was inspiring. If you have any questions, please ask Ted.